The Path of Survival

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Rai'kuro
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The Path of Survival

Postby Rai'kuro » Sat May 30, 2009 3:15 pm

The first part of my first story, it can be found (hopefully) in the furry magazine 'South Fur Lands' I'll be doing on chapter a month for the magazine should everything go to plan which it almost definitely will. Please support the magazine because i heard its been having a little bit of trouble lately :(


Chapter 1

The sky was red with pollution and few stars were visible in the night’s sky. Street lights illuminated the streets of a city still full of life despite the hour. The air was full of noises and smells. People went about their own business, barely even acknowledging each other’s existence. The sirens of an ambulance could be heard off in the distance, hurrying to some accident as were so popular in the cities.

Humans truly are the coldest creatures... thought a being, hidden in the shadows of an alley. He was dressed in a large trench coat with gloves on what looked like hands. He also had a hood pulled over his face. From a respectable distance, he appeared as nothing more than a common beggar. He returned his attention to the dumpster he was scavenging in. Not top long ago, he would've stolen food directly from a shop, but such actions had become dangerous nowadays. It was only a matter of time before he would have to leave the city. Humans were as dangerous as they were stupid, and most took badly to his kind.

He leaped down from the dumpster, giving it a kick. There had been little food to be found this way, and it was getting worse each day as the humans caught onto how they were getting their food. He walked out into the streets, making sure to keep the hood down. Hopefully the others are having better luck then I... He thought sourly to himself.

He watched as humans walked by, making sure none of them tried to look under his hood. As usual they passed him by as a homeless human and tried to keep as far away from him as possible. He wondered if any of these passersby could possibly be an ally. The chances were little and it was better to avoid any form of contact all together.

He came to another dark alley with a few dumpsters in it. He hopped up against the closest and started scavenging though the rubbish. The grim expression he'd had on his hidden face turned into a slight grin as he gave a whoop, pulling out a can of meat, it hadn't even been opened yet! As careful as humans were about throwing out rubbish these days, their laziness and wastefulness would always win out here and there.

He pocketed the can inside his coat and continued to scavenge through the dumpster. His sensitive ears, hidden under his hood, perked up at the sound of footsteps within the ally. "How much you wanna bet he's one of them freaks!?" Came a voice from behind him. He froze, hoping the newcomers weren't referring to him.

"He's too short, they’re meant to be a good head taller then us." came another voice, "I'll wager twenty he's just a hobo." he gave a sigh, the comment about his height clearly meant they were talking about him. He was smaller then the rest of his kind, not because he was short, but because he was still young. He wouldn't reach his full height for another three or so years.

"Oi! Freak on the dumpster!" Came the first voice and he felt something strike him in the back. He grunted and hopped off the dumpster and faced the voice. They were two boys, probably around seventeen. Both had a metal pole in one hand and one of them was throwing an empty can up and down. "Take the hoodie off or we’ll start beating you anyway." The one with the can said, grinning widely.

He didn't want to hurt these two and he most certainly couldn't take off the hood. He had only one remain option, running. He turned around quickly and sprinted down the ally and onto the side walk. He heard them shouting and the can narrowly missed his head. He bolted down the street, holding his hood down with one hand. "Someone, stop him! He's one of them blood thirsty freaks!" One of the boys shouted from behind him and the scavenger cursed under his breath.

Running in these clothes was hard and the hood was making it difficult to see. People quickly moved out of his way and a few women even screamed at the comment the boy had made. There wasn't much point in hiding his appearance anymore. He let go of the hood and it fell from his fur covered head to his shoulders allowing everyone to see him for what he really was.

While his body was humanoid, he was clearly not human. His body had short, black fur covering it. His face had a short muzzle, much like that of a large cat, while his eyes were a dim yellow with his irises being slits instead of circles. His large pointy ears sprung up from being pressed against his head all night and long, white whiskers bounced as he ran.

People were screaming and running as far away from him as possible. He cast a glance backwards and saw the boys weren't nearly as fast as him and a good distance behind him. He faced forwards just in time to avoid a fist that a brave human had swung at him. He heard the man swear and stumble a little before turning and joining in the chase. A few metres ahead of him stood another human, except they had a firearm trained on him!

He swore loudly before turning down the closest alley, hearing a gun shot and the man behind him swearing at the wielder of the gun. He quickly scanned his new surroundings, spotting a fire escape. He bent down and started running on all four before giving a great leap that no human could ever hope to achieve. He grasped part of the fire escape with both of his front paws and used the momentum to flip himself onto the fire escape, three stories from the ground.

Without pausing he began climbing up the fire escape. He didn’t get more then a few steps when a sharp pain exploded in his arm and chest with a gun shot ringing through the air. He staggered a little, his vision blurring. He looked down to see the human reloading their weapon. Without thinking he leaped from the fire escape towards a building.

He crashed through a window and heard a shout of surprise. He rolled on the floor, feeling glass digging into him. He looked up at a startled human looking at him with a mixture of panic, fright, awe, and pity. “Ple-please help me…” He managed to mumble out before his vision clouded over and he slipped into unconsciousness.



A young human boy of the age of fifteen woke with a start, his body sweating. His eyes darting around his room in a panic. His breathing slowed, as did his racing heart as he calmed down. He sat up and looked outside the window. He was a good four stories above the ground, with another buildings fire escape across an ally from him. “Again with the dreams…” he said quietly, rubbing where the cat-like being had been shot.
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pommie
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The Path of Survival

Postby pommie » Sat May 30, 2009 5:44 pm

Would you get offended if I put on my grammar-nazi hat and scrutinised this?
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Rai'kuro
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The Path of Survival

Postby Rai'kuro » Sat May 30, 2009 11:01 pm

Not really, as long as it isn't an all out bash at me. I'm not that great at grammar and spelling but I'm trying to get better and the fastest way is to know what I'm doing wrong, so go ahead. (Although i do ask you give some comments on what I'm doing right, just so i don't feel like I'm a complete and utter failure at this) Also, supportive comments on the actual story, although not much has happened yet, are always nice to read.
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pommie
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The Path of Survival

Postby pommie » Sun May 31, 2009 11:46 am

Shall do then. Assignment today. Your story tomorrow.
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SB_foxx
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The Path of Survival

Postby SB_foxx » Sat Jun 06, 2009 12:12 am

wow, that was really good and really well told, you described everything to the point where i could picture every step of it and aside from the obvious grammar mistakes there wasn’t a bit i didn't like. glad you went with the whole city/urban thing adds so much more danger especially for the "Freaks" (Danger = Action / Action = Awesome).

if you would like, i really think this is something i would enjoy illustrating. i know I’m not the best artist but i think it would be fun.

really looking forward to the next chapter, keep up the good work
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Rai'kuro
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The Path of Survival

Postby Rai'kuro » Sat Jun 06, 2009 1:05 am

Yeah, i ain't that great at grammar, getting better though. Thanks for the support speech, its that kind of thing that keeps me writing. As for illustration, I'm speechless, never thought someone would be asking me if they could illustrate my work, always thought it'd be the other way around. By all means go ahead. As for the next chapter, not sure when it'll be out. The magazine I'm doing the story for releases an issue every three months so it might be awhile, its going to be a fair bit longer though. This one was rather quickly done due to i only had a week to do it XD
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The Path of Survival

Postby SB_foxx » Mon Jun 08, 2009 2:22 am

well heres the first one http://silentbluefoxx.deviantart.com/ar ... -125102180

...i know I’m not the best artist...[/quote]
i did say that just incase it wasn't what you expected
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Rai'kuro
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The Path of Survival

Postby Rai'kuro » Thu Jun 11, 2009 12:34 am

Sorry for the late reply, been busy preparing for exams. As for the picture, I'll leave it at this; If i wasn't speechless I'd be commenting on how well it fits the story, and almost exactly as i pictured the scene when i wrote it. Also the style is perfect for it! :) No complaints here, you've inspired me to hurry up and get the next chapter done so i can see more art of my story :D
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The Path of Survival

Postby Hades » Sun Jun 14, 2009 11:03 pm

A story of radness, written awesomely, described depthfully. Over nine thousand thumbs up :P
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Rai'kuro
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The Path of Survival

Postby Rai'kuro » Mon Jun 15, 2009 5:31 pm

Over nine thousand! That's more the nine thousand XP
Thanks for the encouragement, always good to hear back from my readers. Chapter two will be up soon so stay tuned.

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