Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

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LadyCath
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby LadyCath » Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:00 am

My fiancé is not a furr, in fact deep down I think he reckons its silly. 90% of my days he is totally fine, we even lived with Jet and Kidsune for a period which is when he learnt the most about the fandom but lately a few things he has said are bugging me (for instance this evening as I was adding you all on facebook he was picking on al your names because they weren't your human/real names) and I want to know if anyone has any advice on living and being in a relationship with a non-furr.
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby Pye » Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:25 am

My partner is a non-fur and can be sorta the same way, it doesn't really bother me though but I'm not in the community for much more than the fact that I draw and like cartoons. Kinda just water off a (wolf's) back for me. :wp: I can understand why it bugs you though, maybe just explain that the offhand comments bother you a bit and that being a furry is something you like and it makes you happy so he should ignore it if he's got nothing nice to say. :wlol:
"I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker, and I have seen the eternal footman hold my coat and snicker and in short, I was afraid."

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LadyCath
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby LadyCath » Mon Jul 11, 2011 11:31 pm

Well, this evening he gave me crap because i said "I know a fur" instead of "I know a person" and I told him it hurts my feelings as those furrs are my friends and I am one of them. He said he does not mean it to be mean, he just explained that he finds the whole fandom a little unusual but he accepts it. So at least when i yell at him now for saying something itll be because he has over stepped the boundary.
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby Daz » Mon Jul 11, 2011 11:50 pm

My fiancé is not a furr, in fact deep down I think he reckons its silly. 90% of my days he is totally fine, we even lived with Jet and Kidsune for a period which is when he learnt the most about the fandom but lately a few things he has said are bugging me (for instance this evening as I was adding you all on facebook he was picking on al your names because they weren't your human/real names) and I want to know if anyone has any advice on living and being in a relationship with a non-furr.[/quote]

Well it depends on what the meaning behind his harrassment is, is he just the stirring, joking type, or being quite nasty about it?
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby Joey » Tue Jul 12, 2011 12:07 am

While most likely obvious the reason behind most comments he has made because he is uncomfortable with furries. Mainly because (as you said) he finds it unusual. It is a natural human reaction to react like this to something you are unfamiliar/uncomfortable with.

I would suggest possibly getting him to know it a bit more, maybe meet up with some of your friends in the fandom, show him that everyone is pretty normal. Otherwise I find that it does cause a big element of tension on the relationship, where for one it is a part of them and for the other it is something they don't understand and feel uncomfortable with. By being more understanding of the whole thing I am sure that he will be a lot more accepting.

Or at least that is how I see it :3
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby LadyCath » Tue Jul 12, 2011 7:50 pm

I was talking to him about Fridays meet and greet for rivfer and commenting on how if he went comments like he gave would cause him to get beaten up by a bunch of fursuited furries, and we spent like ten mins laughing about the image of the news headline... "Disabled man beaten by furries creatures in southbank"

Joey we actually had Jet and Kidsune live with us for a good six months or so where we often talked openly about furries and furry life and he heard allot from there and understands all about us but still thinks we are unusual and silly. He could never be furry himself, it just isn't in his bones. I told him he has to agree to disagree.
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby LadyCath » Tue Jul 12, 2011 7:54 pm

Daz I don't believe his remarks are meant to be hurtful in any way however he does not realise that his views on furry are, well to the lack of a better word, racist. He knows I am one and knows that will never change but he will never have any different views. I could educate him till the humans come home but it would not help the cause. I am beginning to think its just one of those things,
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby Pye » Tue Jul 12, 2011 10:41 pm

Definitely sounds like one of those things, agreeing to disagree would probably work best, as long as he understands where the line is with his joking around and there is mutual respect for one another's interests then there shouldn't be a problem! :wlol:
"I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker, and I have seen the eternal footman hold my coat and snicker and in short, I was afraid."

- T.S. Eliot
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Relationship Advice on Non-furr partners?

Postby Daz » Wed Jul 13, 2011 7:58 pm

Well prior to actually knowing the existence of the fandom, let alone knowing myself as one.

When I saw one on a train carriage, I too was confused, and began to find it quite amusing.

But, I think it's just a typical male/Australian behaviour, since I think just about everyone I know including myself, tend to pull fun at such items of interest.
But I know those jokes never usually have any content of disapproval or cynical attitude towards these things, unless they're to earn themselves such a negative reputation.

I don't think the fandom has Popcorn and Pretzels anyone off, so therefore, no one has any means to dissaprove of it, in Australia anyway.. :wroll:

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